When we were children (chronologically at least…) most of us were reassured with this very well-known statement:
“There’s no such thing as a stupid question.”
It was our elders’ way of letting us know that communication was encouraged even if we were embarrassed to ask a question.
Even if we felt it was ‘stupid’.
But for some reason, the online world is a breeding ground for stupidity. Maybe it’s because those who partake in retardassery (yes I said it so keep your PC responses in your trap) can hide behind their Chef-Boyardee-covered keyboard.
So I wanted to point out some examples of plain stupid-ass questions (and my responses) you should never not only ask me, but anyone else if you want to be taken with even a modicum of seriousness about your business...or your attempt at one.
So without further A Doo Doo…
There’s no such thing as a stupid question: A Boxed Set Greatest Misses...
“Can I do ‘this’ without putting in money or any work?”
– Yes. Uh…no. Maybe. It depends what planet you’re from. Pluto, yes. Somewhere in the Andromeda galaxy where everything is the opposite of ours, sure. Here? No. At least ‘no’ if you’re asking me.
“Will you set my business up for me…get it making money then give me the business back?”
– Some of my online marketing friends actually get asked this very question. My answer: You have balls. But you’re an idiot. And the answer is still no.
“Last time I’m going to offer you my ‘no money-no work-reply-to-emails-super-matrix-1,200-a-day’ super system. You in or out?”
– I’m out. And so are you….to lunch. Grab me a Reuben and a side of ‘you’re a moron’ while you’re there.
“Did you realize you’re not very smart for not going all in on Cryptocurrency?” (This was the other day)
*Pauses and looks up while at the crap table* “What was that??” (Editors Note: I'm a Crypto believer BTW...but most treat it like a casino. Wrong move...)
“Why am I not ranking #1 for [the search term] ‘make money’ on Google? I’ve shared it on my Twitter and Facebook…and I shared it there TWICE!”
Gosh darn…I don’t know. You know, I’m having the same problem ranking #1 for the term ‘Google’ and 'Dumbass'. Weird…
"Thanks for accepting my friend request. I hope you're doing better. Oh...you're fine and you say I don't know you? Why the attitude Ken? You know...your mood would be better if you took my Acai-Keto-Vegan-Carnivo-Urine-Supplement...."
Oh good! I'll order a bottle as soon as I finish this batch of sawdust-covered nails I'm taking...
“Did you know that I love you so much??”
– I’ve been getting this lately from some of the spectacular ‘ladies’ that troll Facebook. Yes, I know that I’m stupendous. Thank you! Let’s get married right away in Manila...
Ask Stupid Questions...Get Stupid Answers
Here's a novel concept: You get what you give. You give pablum...you get pablum. You give horseshit...you get toxic waste (I'm not about to put horses in the same category as the pablum above because I happen to really like horses).
Looksie here...questions are great...even necessary (except for me as I've figured it all out....) but when you go out of your way to be lost in the woods you get what you ask for.
A line I always remember from Pulp Fiction: "I'm trying real hard to be the shepherd..."
But some of you make it difficult. I want to help...I really do. Start by asking real questions. Start by reading through what I teach here with Affiliate and Email Marketing.
Start by being real with yourself.
The answers are there for the taking....