Suffer From Social Media Phobia? Do This...
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Suffer From Social Media Phobia? Do This…

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Do you suffer from Social Media Phobia? - Kenneth Holland

Do you suffer from Social Media Phobia? If you do, let me give you one key remedy (kinda like a cough syrup) because you’re gonna need it…

It’s the new scourge of the earth and taking down anyone who gets in its way.

It doesn’t discriminate.

It’ll chew you up and spit you out.

It plays with Hot Wheels.

(Ok…I got a little carried away there…)

I’m talking about the dreaded disease, Social Media Phobia.

Let me bold it and put in italics: Social Media Phobia. (Not sure that’ll be any good for SEO)

And if you suffer from this malady, let me give you one key remedy (kinda like a cough syrup).

What is Social Media Phobia Anyway?

It has several forms, so let’s take them one by one…or least until I get tired and stop because I want a beer (which I think will be soon…)

3. The ‘Everyone will know where I’m posting from’ fear: You’ve met them…they gripe that if they use their phone for ANYTHING other than a phone call or a text the world will know their location. Damn! That’s serious. SOLUTION: Turn off ‘location services’ in settings. This might take 2 minutes so I understand the commitment to solving this. Here’s a wet towel to cool you off.

2. The ‘Everyone will know where I’m posting from’ fear PLUS TEN: This includes the ‘you know the world is tracking AND seeing you through your camera’ conspiracy theorists so these gentiles are much smarter than everyone. SOLUTION: Well, there is none because the world is after you but you could try doing your very own video of the ‘Moon landing and 911 was fake’ and buying every VHS copy of “JFK” so no one else can get them…hurry…dammit…go get all of them!

1. And the most important: The ‘I don’t mess with Social Media Because I Live Under a Rock’. These are the people who have rotary dial telephones and still buy stamps. Some of these people even have a business but they’re not ‘gonna do that internet thing’ because…well..it’s a thing…you know.

So What is the Remedy Sir Ken?

Thought you’d never ask. (Seriously…I was hoping you wouldn’t because I’m already tired of writing and thinking of that beer…).

The remedy is stop living under that rock in your backyard. The amount of continuous whining on this subject makes me shake my head in abject horror…or really more like shakes because I’m craving that beer.

The sheer opportunity that is passing many of you by is stunning to me…yet to the ‘many of you’ you seem to not understand what has already happened. You have such an opportunity and you’re squandering and I suggest you open your eyes

Because this is just the beginning.

Time for that beer.

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